Friday, 28 June 2013
More of the Same, but Indooors
I think things are getting back to normal re. my strength and energy levels
as this morning I went for a foray around the ground floor with my friend Henry.
Despite his look of coy invitation,
it is over a month since my home received Henry's ministrations.
Hubby had offered his services
but our floors hadn't reached a sufficient level of crunchiness to risk
putting his "that'll do" attitude to cleaning,
versus my pernicketyness,
to the test.
I admit that as my energy levels have risen this week
Henry has not been my first port of call.
First dibs on my energy went on two oil paintings I re-started.
Here's one that still has quite a way to go.
Strange I should think of vacuuming ,
and not going into the studio and picking up my brushes.
"getting back to normal",
Well, not so strange when you think of the strict housewifely rules
which were integral to so much of my growing up.
Perhaps I really am learning to "accept the chaos"
(mentioned in the post My Father is the Gardener)
in ever more ways.
It would be great if a decrease in my pernickety inner ctritic
could mean an increase in the acceptance of myself and others.
Maybe an increase in such tolerance might even lead
to an increase in internal or physical energy...?
We all have
this critical voice,
so internalised ,
we have long accepted it's demands as our own.
I pray this weekend you will find new freedom to
silence any such harrying voice,
and to hear,
and make your own,
the sweet acceptance of all you are;
messy bits and all.
It's no good looking at me like that Henry,
I don't know when you're coming out again.