peace for the year ahead
part of my road to wholeness.
which most inhibited my Freedom of integrity ,
I experienced as
A Grace of the heart
the Spirit's down payment, (Eph.1:14)
how often it is that my little heart goes
The explosion needn't be as big or as visible
as this wave breaking on the rocks,
but the Holy Spirit,
has drawn my attention to how easily I lose my peace.
They may be small signs but
I notice my fists balling with impatience
at mindless chatter,
my far from charitable thoughts to fellow drivers,
the fact even inanimate objects can make me angry at times...
I see how easily my irritation is aroused
at countless mundane things.
How easily I can be saddened or maddened.
My mother used to remark on my explosions when I was a kid,
"No wonder there are wars!"
It's when the pot is jolted we discover what is really inside
by what spills out.
I know I'm more susceptible when I'm tired
or not very well,
so I'm not merely being hard on myself.
Actually the Spirit is making me sensitive
to how much my peace
can also depend on taking better care of myself.
Our emotional and spiritual well being
are not separate from our physical health,
but all part of the one whole.
Even in the first weeks of living with this new openness
to peace within
I have begun to recognise those things
which are taking too much out of me,
and what I need to avoid, and what cultivate.
I have become more conscious of the choice
to live out of the quiet lake within,
rather than the roar of my heart hitting the rocks.
Not to say I have mastered the art of
letting my life be so centred:
but I am travelling hopefully
towards that grace.
And really, I'm wondering as I write
if you might have a reason right now
to be pursuing a deeper heart peace yourself.
Firstly, starting on the outside,
do you need to let yourself off the hook
regarding some commitment, or pastime
that isn't fuelled from a true heart desire,
but rather some idea of yourself you need not follow.
Is there something you have taken on that,
no matter how good it looks,
has become burdensome
and would be a relief to let go?
(Relief could well be another word for peace
in this instance.)
Of course I don't mean something has just got difficult,
but something that seems to suck the life out of you.
Pray about letting it go if you discover something.
Perhaps ask a wise friend to help you decide
it's significance, and come to a decision.
Secondly, find a way to
discover your own inner place of heart peace
if you haven't already done so,
by finding a meditation practice which suits you,
There are so many on offer on the web and elsewhere.
Until you find a more permanent meditative practice
you might like to start by
at the very least finding a place
for a few moments quiet for yourself this weekend.
Broom cupboards, toilet cubicles,
hiding behind a newspaper on a train...
the options are endless so be imaginative!
Once you have found your place,
swimming down to the bottom of your breath,
to your own secret place below your heart,
and allow every breath to assure you,
you are loved.
A few minutes, and
You will have made a good start!
P.S. Apologies for strange lay out and line spacing in places.
Blogger has gone wonky.